Tag: BDSM
Voyeur
He likes to watch. He sits across the room, his eyes on me, always on me, like hands, like heat. One time it was the afterparty at the video shoot. He told them I was a sex slave, an object for their use, a fucktoy. I don’t know if he…
Expectations
So I am filled with anticipation about tomorrow night. I know I shouldn’t be, because like as not, my expectations will be too high, and the result will not meet them, and then, no matter how wonderful the night is, there will always be that little shadow hanging over it.…
Primary Function
My relationship with my SO, in regards to BDSM, is not always clearly defined. Oh the roles themselves when we are in that space–he is Top, I am bottom–are always very clear, but within our “real life” relationship we are equals, and it is only when we enter that space…
Anxiety
I’ll be honest. I’m sick with anxiety. Literally, physically, ill. My stomach hurts and rumbles with it. My heart flutters when I think about it, when I think about my upcoming trip. I alternate between wanting to see W with an intensity that borders on obsessive to not wanting to…
Anniversary Post
Today is, almost to the day, the one-year anniversary of the first time W and I met. And what a year it’s been! I started this blog soon after that auspicious beginning, and have chronicled our relationship and many of the things we have done in that time, right here.…
Choice
It started days ago; weeks maybe. “If you come, I’ll let it be known that your function there is as a sex slave, there for anyone’s pleasure or use.” Now I’d love to tell you a story about how I arrived at said place, was chained to a bed in…
Obeying Instructions
I don’t often get instructions about tasks to perform or things to do during my day. Yesterday I got one though. The reasoning, to atone for my feeling of “badgirlness” for skipping work on Monday, was tongue-in-cheek, since he doesn’t do punishment (“I don’t need a reason to do bad…
The Mean Guy
I went over to his house after work, intending to pick up blackberries and my tit collars and a couple other things I had left over there after the long weekend, before heading back out for a run. Or, maybe that was what I had intended in the beginning, when…
Getting Hung
Suspensions are all about flying. Flying free of the bonds that hold us to the earth, flying within the bonds that both keep us safe while we are airborne and hold us there, butterflies captured for a brief moment. I’ve never actually been a big fan of watching a suspension.…
A caned butt is a happy butt
I left W’s this morning after about five hours sleep last night. We can’t seem to go to bed early to save our lives, even when I have to work in the morning. Or even if we do, we end up fooling around in that special way W has of…
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